Separation Support Blog

How to recognise a controlling person in yourself and others

Charlotte Lingard - Wednesday, March 22, 2017
How to recognise the signs of a controlling person


An unhealthy relationship almost always contains one lethal component;

• a controlling or dominating personality.


This causes an imbalance of power within the relationship.

Power within a relationship should be apportioned out in equal measure.

Whether it concerns finance, parenting issues or simply what film to watch on television.

Problems begin to occur when one party begins to make the majority or the entirety of all the decisions.

This then forms the essence of the relationship.


Here are some vital indications of a person with a controlling personality: -

• Not accepting responsibility in difficult situations. Finding creative ways to shift the blame back onto you the normal person.

• Persons who wear several different masks such as home, work and family masks. Very different sides of behaviour.

• Often distorting reality of situations to suit their objectives and desired outcomes using manipulative methods.

• Multiple personalities in one body.

• Controlling persons often play the victim. Any flaws associated with themselves are often justified by some sort of suffering.

• Pathological lying. Unable to tell the truth. They lie their way out of trouble.

• Spot and play on your weaknesses. Automatically you experience some form of guilt tripping, believing it was all your fault.

• Due to their manipulative methods, they intentionally pretend to love and help you. In reality they are creating a debt, so you will eventually become beholden to them to satisfy their needs.

• Constant interruptions during decision making conversations with you. Indifference and dismissal of your opinion over matters whether big and small.

• Evading issues that concern their own faults and changing the truth to suit their needs.

• Seldom answering questions directly causing you cognitive dissonance.


These behavioural signs can be at varying degrees of intensity and not an exhaustive list.

Manipulative and controlling persons are experts in psychological behaviour because of their own lack of feelings.

They learn how to behave by studying others and become experts in the role of manipulation.

You may be able to live in blissful ignorance of these behaviour traits if they are indeed that subtle.

Having an understanding and awareness of these characteristics is one step towards solving the problem.

Nevertheless, understanding the issues alone will not abolish the complexity of the predatory mind-set.

This is a unique kind of traumatic relationship with a person who has a psychological personality dichotomy disorder.

These persons are experts in using manipulative behaviour to achieve their own desired outcome.

The purpose of this type of behaviour is to change the perception of the reality of the situation.

These personality signs described above could be the catalyst that tears you apart.

The controlling person can become a wounded animal due to their predator mind-set.

The purpose being to make you disbelieve the truth and change the situation to suit their needs and objective.

This can escalate to violent or abusive behaviour towards you.


This can then become the beginning of the end.


The normal person subjected to the dissonant mental behaviour starts to understand the reality of the situation.

The normal person needs to find the strength to leave the relationship, become stronger, or live with the behavioural characteristics traits of a predator.


You are not mad; your partner is not mad. The dysfunctional behaviour traits associated with living with someone who has a controlling and manipulative personality disorder is extremely mentally exhausting, if you are the normal person.


We as individuals are not mentally prepared to hold two differing belief systems at the same time. It creates internal conflict.

A normal mind-set wants to be in a harmonious and balanced relationship. Living with a person with two personae

(split personality characteristics) is extremely difficult and challenging.


It is an optical illusion.


Some normal persons in this kind of relationship delay the inevitable by trying to understand and probably blaming themselves.

This of course is playing into the hands of the person with the personality disorder.

At the end of the relationship the person with the split personality often escalates their behaviour and violence towards the normal person.


So, the game is up and we move on.


Specialist trained counsellors in this area who understands the needs and sensitivity of the situation is advisable.

Share this post

Comments
Instagram Password Finder commented on 16-Jan-2019 08:21 PM
If you wish forr tto increase youг familiarity only keеp visiting thjs web ρage ɑnd
be updated with the most up-to-date infоrmation posted
һere.
Gail Rinebarger commented on 20-Jan-2019 11:42 PM
I got this site from my pal who told me concerning this website and at the moment this time I am visiting this web page and reading very informative articles at this time.|
Corey commented on 26-Jan-2019 04:34 AM
I have read so many content on the topic of the blogger lovers but this article is genuinely a nice post,
keep it up.
Elden Mccaughan commented on 27-Jan-2019 01:03 AM
Hiya, Can I export this post photo and usage it on my personal site?
Virgen Stonewall commented on 02-Feb-2019 12:28 AM
I really love the way you discuss this kind of topic.;,’`.
SnapGene 4.1.27 Crack + Keygen Free Download  commented on 03-Feb-2019 03:47 AM
This is the precise weblog for anyone who needs to search out out about this topic. You realize a lot its nearly onerous to argue with you (not that I actually would want…HaHa). You undoubtedly put a brand new spin on a topic thats been written about for years. Great stuff, simply nice!
Jeremy commented on 04-Feb-2019 07:10 PM
Peculiar article, just what I needed.
Vinnie Barlett commented on 05-Feb-2019 06:48 PM
[b]Grownup Webcam Performer Strategies - Make Your To start with $5000.[/b]The Grownup Net cam sector is The most beneficial chances you will discover wherever on the web right now. Being an web cam performer, you can also make an hourly pay corresponding to that of organization government; not simply will it pay back extremely nicely, however you'll also attain a lot of time by not needing to waste time commuting to operate on a daily basis.Male or feminine, you can begin earning a considerable amount of cash Doing the job through the comfort and ease of your individual property, with as little as two several hours a day.The amount you is likely to make is determined by several elements for example your Actual physical attractiveness, your temperament, plus your willingness to perform within the personal place. New adult webcam performers can hope to make $2000 to $5000 in their extremely to start with thirty day period Operating as very little as two several hours working day, whilst major undertaking products could make in excess of $20,000 every month.You might think that Doing work being an Grownup webcam performer is easy perform, but do you really have what it takes to become a on-line design?Below tend to be the methods of the trade for producing your very first $5000.[b]Webcam Design Suggestion #one - Have Fun.[/b]Don't visualize it as function. Consider it as flirting. Get on digital camera to have fun! Maintain this your Main concentration and you'll have no challenge generating lots of cash.[b]Webcam Product Tip #two - Be Geared up.[/b]Never ever make your guests wait around. To stay on camera, maintain your props, toys, or any modifications to the outfit close by so that you will not have to go "off cam" to go get some thing.[b]Webcam Model Tip #3 - Get Repeat People.[/b]Permitting your shoppers know when You will be back again on the net (whether It is hrs from now or A further working day) is a straightforward way to get spending shoppers to return for much more! And once you do established a time and date, you'll want to be by the due date. This aids Make believe in along with your consumers, that means more money for you personally.[b]Webcam Product Suggestion #4 - Use Readers Name.[/b]In cost-free chat, make sure you make use of your buyers' nickname. People have to have to know that you're chatting to them personally. Also, learn their serious names. Paying out prospects desire to come to feel an emotional connection for you. Studying and memorizing names will get you far more repeat having to pay prospects.[b]Webcam Model Tip #5 - Search Hot.[/b]Put on make-up and also have your hair carried out. Also make sure you have many different sexy lingerie, outfits, see by outfits, and many others. and change outfits from day after day to provide prospects wide range. Brilliant colors which include purple, orange, blue, eco-friendly and pink draw in far more buyers, so you should also be matching the colors of the sheets/curtains with all your outfits.[b]Dont be shy, have a great time and get paid some hard cash $$$ : [url="http://tinyurl.com/veqthjk"]Click HERE for more Details[/url] !!! [/b]
amberevent.lv commented on 07-Feb-2019 07:35 AM
I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme.

Did you design this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you?
Plz respond as I'm looking to construct my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from.
thanks
oduck.xyz commented on 08-Feb-2019 12:47 AM
I do agree with all the ideas you have introduced in your post.
They're really convincing and can certainly work.
Nonetheless, the posts are very short for starters. May you please lengthen them
a bit from subsequent time? Thanks for the post.
operatorbonus.ru commented on 08-Feb-2019 05:58 AM
naturally like your web-site but you have to check the spelling on several of your posts.
A number of them are rife with spelling issues
and I to find it very troublesome to tell the reality on the
other hand I'll surely come again again.
Leon commented on 08-Feb-2019 08:39 AM
Wow, marvelous blog layout! How long have you been blogging for?

you make blogging look easy. The overall look of your site is fantastic, as well as the
content!
www.klerksdorptrade.info commented on 08-Feb-2019 10:23 AM
Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just
curious if you get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you protect against it, any plugin or anything
you can recommend? I get so much lately it's driving me mad so any
support is very much appreciated.
agen bola commented on 08-Feb-2019 03:50 PM
I have been browsing online more than 3 hours today,
yet I never found any interesting article like yours. It's pretty worth enough for me.

In my view, if all website owners and bloggers made good content as you did,
the net will be much more useful than ever before. sbobet
Keri commented on 10-Feb-2019 07:16 PM
Hence they opt for PPI Claims, where they might
claim and have their back. b) These plans can be used to buy estate taxes along with other settlement amounts.
Landlord's security insurance policy materials safety for losses arising from theft, damage for your home introduced about by tenants.
Albertina commented on 11-Feb-2019 07:04 AM
To shorten the hunting process when you want to match car insurance quickly, you are able to
visit among the many websites which will narrow your
search. Since insurance plans feature many terms and coverage options then you need
some legal knowledge and also financial knowledge to pick which policy which is best fits
your needs. That is why it is vital that you
should educate and prepare yourself plus your home because the US economy skids into another recession.
7988wan.com commented on 11-Feb-2019 10:32 AM
Emergency evacuation insurance plans are for many who should travel urgently for a business
meeting or medical tour supposing. If you pay all of your premium entirely, it is possible to ask
for a discount from a insurer. That is why it is crucial that you
must educate and prepare plus your home because the US economy skids into
another recession.
www.iamsport.org commented on 11-Feb-2019 03:29 PM
The trick is applying the internet to buy around and be given a price that is
affordable. If you pay all of your premium completely, you'll be able to ask for the discount from your insurer.

Landlord's security coverage materials safety for losses due to theft, damage for your home introduced about by tenants.
Download Velvet Buzzsaw full movie commented on 12-Feb-2019 12:06 PM
Spot ᧐n with thiѕ write-up, I truⅼy believ that
thіs website needs a greаt deal more attention.
I'll prⲟbably be Ьack aɡain to reaⅾ mⲟгe,
thanks foг tһе info!
monroesteinmetz.wordpress.com commented on 13-Feb-2019 06:09 AM
Rest assured that the Oklahoma City property managers is fairly skilled at distinguishing
fake through the genuine ones. Some of the tasks undertaken by home remodeling companies include repair, remodel, add-on, and customization. Before signing the agreement you should discuss in details materials to become
found in building the pool along with the equipment to get installed.
Dulcie commented on 13-Feb-2019 06:17 AM
A general contractor could be the person responsible for the renovation and demolition of
roads, freeways and buildings. You must therefore know first of what you long for it
to ensure that obtaining the greatest pergola plan there's which you need
to put up inside a garden will probably be certain. In simple terms, retainage, because practice exists
inside construction industry, (a) doesn't function as security
for owners, general contractors or subcontractors; and (b)
diminishes the contractor's efficient operation by unnecessarily tying up capital.
Lily commented on 13-Feb-2019 11:21 AM
Hello, the ԝhole thing iis going nicely here and ofcourse every one is sharing information, thɑt's genuinely
excellent, keep up writing.
Dora commented on 13-Feb-2019 01:14 PM
Rest assured that the Oklahoma City property managers
is pretty skilled at distinguishing fake in the genuine ones.
Months ahead of the decision to trade the property is done, the homeowner must have
a look at their very own property, both inside and out, over the eyes of the potential buyer.
A little search will cause you to a number of websites focusing on steel buildings for sale.
Dollie commented on 13-Feb-2019 02:21 PM
Of course, this is a costly venture, but could rejuvenate the entire appearance.
Months prior to decision to sell the exact property
is made, the homeowner must look at their own property, both inside and out, over the eyes of an potential buyer.

In short, retainage, as the practice exists within the construction industry, (a) will not function as a to protect owners, general contractors or subcontractors; and
(b) diminishes the contractor's efficient operation by unnecessarily
tying up capital.
Brayden commented on 14-Feb-2019 09:48 AM
Rest assured that the Oklahoma City property managers is fairly good at distinguishing fake in the genuine ones.
This is not in any respect a trendy service because the charges are quite high much more compared
to a loft conversion or any other. If they find anything amiss,
they will notify the builder and ask for that they make changes.

Post a Comment




Captcha Image

Trackback Link
http://www.separationsupport.com/BlogRetrieve.aspx?BlogID=11221&PostID=641357&A=Trackback
Trackbacks
Post has no trackbacks.

About Separation Support

Our Details

Quick Links

Separation Support Guide

Separation Support is a free to access independent web portal for people going through separation (separators).  Our aim is providing “separators” with necessary support and information which is unbiased to help you consider all the implications that may arise from your separation.  You may need to consider legal, financial and emotional matters.  We can signpost you to the correct expert in their chosen field.

1 Hardman Boulevard

Spinningfields

Manchester

M3 3AQ

 

charlotte@separationhelp.co.uk

Entrepreneurial Spark Logo powered by Natwest

We're so glad you found us. You'll find lots of free help and advice on dealing with separation in our guide.

©Copyright Separation Support Ltd/ Separation Help CIC UK - All Rights Reserved.

Terms & Conditions.  Cookie and Privacy Policies.